2-28-10 grateful for today

1. Clarity
2. Illumination of my patterns of behavior
3. The full moon
4. Loss and my expression of Grief
5. Forgiveness
6. Mother Earth
7. The sun
8. The stars
9. The universe
10. All that there was, is, and will be

I asked for and received clarity yesterday on a very important relationship to me. That relationship is still very important to me and I'm grateful for the clarity because I'm able to allow the relationship to shift towards it's true nature. Clarity also brought a feeling of loss for me as I realize I will not be able to experience new feelings of romance and excitement with this man. I do celebrate and cherish my experiences and feelings of the possibility of romance with this man. I am grateful for this learning experience. It was good for me. I honor my loss and grief and also honor my new feelings that are forming as this relationship shifts to a good friendship. I celebrate this growth in myself and our relationship.

I'm reading that previous paragraph back and it reads to me as rhetoric, which is not my feeling nor intention behind it. In order to keep the person confidential, I have some learning to do in sharing my feelings while not revealing or betraying the other person in the relationship I'm talking about. Maybe my lesson here is that I don't need to share with other people about my relationships, only share with others my relationship with them and my feelings? Maybe my brain in its attempt to understand what my feelings and spirit already understand falls back on what it knows and how to communicate it.

I am feeling much love with sadness today. This is new for me. It's like I have longed for the feeling I have read about in every beautiful melancholy poem and finally feel it.

That's my 15 minutes.