1. My adorable dog
2. My wonderful career in my passion and shooting a commercial tonight
3. Forgiveness
4. Unconditional love
5. Honoring my process and emotions
6. Creativity and talent
7. Spiritual connection
8. Tai Chi
9. Unlimited choices
10. Responsibility.
I have Forgiveness on my list. I am grateful for Forgiveness. I, however, am not feeling forgiving to myself or others. I'm grateful that it is out there and I have experienced it and I know what it is. It is a slow process sometimes with me. I have emotions when I'm considering forgiving, emotions during the forgiveness, and emotions afterward. I don't want to skip over anything and just say "I forgive." I want to FEEL forgiveness.
Love and Light.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Monday, July 25, 2011
7-25-11 grateful for today
1. My wonderful job doing what I love
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. The afternoon off to take care of me
5. Breathing
6. Noble friends
7. Unconditional love
8. Trees moving in the breeze
9. Possiblities to change and transform
10. Dinner premade.
I didn't want to write this list today. I have not been feeling good, or grateful, or happy. I'm struggling to breathe, to eat healthy, to clean my place, to Do as opposed to Sit. I'm basically struggling to live today.
Love and Light.
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. The afternoon off to take care of me
5. Breathing
6. Noble friends
7. Unconditional love
8. Trees moving in the breeze
9. Possiblities to change and transform
10. Dinner premade.
I didn't want to write this list today. I have not been feeling good, or grateful, or happy. I'm struggling to breathe, to eat healthy, to clean my place, to Do as opposed to Sit. I'm basically struggling to live today.
Love and Light.
Friday, July 22, 2011
7-22-11 grateful for today
1. Settling and paying off my debts
2. My car running well
3. My adorable dog
4. Doing what I am passionate about at my job
5. Connection with friends
6. Unconditional love
7. Deeper meaning
8. Attending to my well being
9. Friday
10. Endless opportunities in every moment
I've been struggling with writing. It seems like an odd thing for me to be struggling with. For most of my life, words flow and writing has been a release and a joy for me. I've also been struggling with breathing. This is something that is very familiar to me until about 3 years ago when after an emotional group process, breathing became effortless. Now my breathing seems to have become labored again and I am feeling down. Choices of what to do, everyday decisions and choices and responsibility to be owned and honored. I think that's the part I forget, to honor. I honor what I have received.
Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. My adorable dog
4. Doing what I am passionate about at my job
5. Connection with friends
6. Unconditional love
7. Deeper meaning
8. Attending to my well being
9. Friday
10. Endless opportunities in every moment
I've been struggling with writing. It seems like an odd thing for me to be struggling with. For most of my life, words flow and writing has been a release and a joy for me. I've also been struggling with breathing. This is something that is very familiar to me until about 3 years ago when after an emotional group process, breathing became effortless. Now my breathing seems to have become labored again and I am feeling down. Choices of what to do, everyday decisions and choices and responsibility to be owned and honored. I think that's the part I forget, to honor. I honor what I have received.
Love and Light.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
7-13-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable loving dog
2. Being a video editor/producer, having fun at my job
3. Music
4. Attending to my well being
5. Endless possibilities in every moment
6. Life experiences
7. Honoring my emotions
8. Receiving all that I have
9. My car running well
10. Unconditional love
I came up with my list fast today. I don't know what I want to write in this part of my post. I'm doing well today. I've felt happy, anxious, joy, fear, sadness, despair, hope, trust, faith, confusion, clearness, peace, silliness all today. I would say a roller coaster, but not really. More like a flow. I'm flowing with my emotions today.
Love and light.
2. Being a video editor/producer, having fun at my job
3. Music
4. Attending to my well being
5. Endless possibilities in every moment
6. Life experiences
7. Honoring my emotions
8. Receiving all that I have
9. My car running well
10. Unconditional love
I came up with my list fast today. I don't know what I want to write in this part of my post. I'm doing well today. I've felt happy, anxious, joy, fear, sadness, despair, hope, trust, faith, confusion, clearness, peace, silliness all today. I would say a roller coaster, but not really. More like a flow. I'm flowing with my emotions today.
Love and light.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
7-12-11 grateful for today
1. My happy adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. An awesome job doing what I'm passionate about
4. Love and support
5. Friends and community
6. Exercise and wellness challenge at work
7. Learning new things
8. Creativity
9. Endless opportunities and choices
10. Breathing
This list is helpful to me today. I've been struggling over the weekend with faith and feeling connected to The Greater Magnificence. My limited atheist view has snuck up on me and has tried to undermine my feeling of deeper meaning and purpose with my life. I was very much an analytical person that only believed in what I could prove and write an equation or formula for. I was closed off from deep connection with anything or anybody. I was going through the motions of surviving life and not living it. Being open to faith and open to connection is wonderful, I'm also open to being hurt and that's what happened over the weekend. I wanted to trust in divine guidance, thought I was being led to something I could count on, a used car that was reliable. I put trust and faith in my decision to buy it and in 4 days I've had to replace the battery and radiator. Which in the analytical and rational world is understandable based on the age of the car. Emotionally, I am struggling to trust and not fall into fear. I spent too many years with the fear of "will the car start today?" Which was a choice then to keep my in my comfortable fear zone. I'm struggling to trust that my car is running and will be reliable. That cynical atheist fear I kept myself in, I told myself would keep me from being hurt when the car doesn't start. And I've experienced over the last four days of trusting that it is a reliable car and my hurt of when it did not start or run well. I guess trusting it every day keeps me out of suffering and yeah the feelings are acute when there is a problem with the car. I'd rather enjoy the car and the trust for most of the time, and know I will survive my acute feelings at times when the car doesn't run. Kind of like honoring all the time we have with each other and in this life, rather than live in fear of some illness or disease or catastrophe that might happen.
Love and Light
2. My car running well
3. An awesome job doing what I'm passionate about
4. Love and support
5. Friends and community
6. Exercise and wellness challenge at work
7. Learning new things
8. Creativity
9. Endless opportunities and choices
10. Breathing
This list is helpful to me today. I've been struggling over the weekend with faith and feeling connected to The Greater Magnificence. My limited atheist view has snuck up on me and has tried to undermine my feeling of deeper meaning and purpose with my life. I was very much an analytical person that only believed in what I could prove and write an equation or formula for. I was closed off from deep connection with anything or anybody. I was going through the motions of surviving life and not living it. Being open to faith and open to connection is wonderful, I'm also open to being hurt and that's what happened over the weekend. I wanted to trust in divine guidance, thought I was being led to something I could count on, a used car that was reliable. I put trust and faith in my decision to buy it and in 4 days I've had to replace the battery and radiator. Which in the analytical and rational world is understandable based on the age of the car. Emotionally, I am struggling to trust and not fall into fear. I spent too many years with the fear of "will the car start today?" Which was a choice then to keep my in my comfortable fear zone. I'm struggling to trust that my car is running and will be reliable. That cynical atheist fear I kept myself in, I told myself would keep me from being hurt when the car doesn't start. And I've experienced over the last four days of trusting that it is a reliable car and my hurt of when it did not start or run well. I guess trusting it every day keeps me out of suffering and yeah the feelings are acute when there is a problem with the car. I'd rather enjoy the car and the trust for most of the time, and know I will survive my acute feelings at times when the car doesn't run. Kind of like honoring all the time we have with each other and in this life, rather than live in fear of some illness or disease or catastrophe that might happen.
Love and Light
Thursday, July 7, 2011
7-7-11 grateful for today
1. Working in a creative team
2. Learning new techniques
3. My adorable dog
4. Possibility of buying a car today
5. Unconditional love of me, where I am, others, where they are
6. Honor my emotions, my lessons, what I have already learned
7. Faith
8. My comfy, warm, sweatshirt jacket
9. Attending to my needs
10. Openness
I'm so grateful that I have a possibility of looking at and buying a used car today from a friend of a trusted friend. I have been without a car and grateful for the bus system yesterday and today and I'm so happy that I may have another vehicle of my own by the end of today. Here's to hoping and trusting.
Love and Light.
2. Learning new techniques
3. My adorable dog
4. Possibility of buying a car today
5. Unconditional love of me, where I am, others, where they are
6. Honor my emotions, my lessons, what I have already learned
7. Faith
8. My comfy, warm, sweatshirt jacket
9. Attending to my needs
10. Openness
I'm so grateful that I have a possibility of looking at and buying a used car today from a friend of a trusted friend. I have been without a car and grateful for the bus system yesterday and today and I'm so happy that I may have another vehicle of my own by the end of today. Here's to hoping and trusting.
Love and Light.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
7-5-11 grateful for today
1. Rental car
2. My adorable dog
3. Emotional process
4. Meditation
5. My incredibly creative job
6. Abundance
7. Honor
8. Love
9. Magazines
10. Openness
I have to turn my rental car back in today. I have not found a $2000 or less car to buy yet. I'll be taking the bus tomorrow. I got out my skateboard and dusted it off and the wheels crumbled. I'm faced with even more decisions, buy new wheels, buy a whole new board, buy a bicycle instead? I'll be taking the bus and a skateboard is easier to carry onboard and I don't have to deal with bike rack on the bus. The bike I could ride farther than the skateboard. Too bad South Florida doesn't have any hills to coast down.
This is the spinning my mind has been doing on me lately. I need meditation moreso now than when everything is coasting along smoothly. I struggle with doing meditation more when my mind is spinning. My mantra for today: Decide and live!
Love and Light.
2. My adorable dog
3. Emotional process
4. Meditation
5. My incredibly creative job
6. Abundance
7. Honor
8. Love
9. Magazines
10. Openness
I have to turn my rental car back in today. I have not found a $2000 or less car to buy yet. I'll be taking the bus tomorrow. I got out my skateboard and dusted it off and the wheels crumbled. I'm faced with even more decisions, buy new wheels, buy a whole new board, buy a bicycle instead? I'll be taking the bus and a skateboard is easier to carry onboard and I don't have to deal with bike rack on the bus. The bike I could ride farther than the skateboard. Too bad South Florida doesn't have any hills to coast down.
This is the spinning my mind has been doing on me lately. I need meditation moreso now than when everything is coasting along smoothly. I struggle with doing meditation more when my mind is spinning. My mantra for today: Decide and live!
Love and Light.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
7-2-11 grateful for today
1. Life
2. My adorable dog
3. Tai Chi class
4. Movies
5. My brothers
6. Fresh Air, the outdoors
7. Having a rental car for the weekend
8. Love
9. Emotions
10. Honor
I have a rough time on the weekends. I plan all week when I am away from my house all the projects and the cleaning and organizing I will do when I get home. Then I walk through the door and I feel like I walk into a suffocating depression, weight. My dog is here in this all day. Very rude of me to leave my dog in this energy all day. I don't like staying in it for a day. And not even a day, I went to a 2 hour Tai Chi class today. And I have a rental car until Tuesday. And I had planned to look hard for a used car today for me to buy. And I didn't. I have all the channels now for free. All the on demand and tv for free. This is what I love to create. Movies. I'm not creating them if I'm watching them. I'm not creating anything if I watch them. The power of video is great. I saw that last week with my group trying to explain to them about a "Circle of Trust" and I showed the video and they got it. I need to try things. I need to experience life.
Love and light.
2. My adorable dog
3. Tai Chi class
4. Movies
5. My brothers
6. Fresh Air, the outdoors
7. Having a rental car for the weekend
8. Love
9. Emotions
10. Honor
I have a rough time on the weekends. I plan all week when I am away from my house all the projects and the cleaning and organizing I will do when I get home. Then I walk through the door and I feel like I walk into a suffocating depression, weight. My dog is here in this all day. Very rude of me to leave my dog in this energy all day. I don't like staying in it for a day. And not even a day, I went to a 2 hour Tai Chi class today. And I have a rental car until Tuesday. And I had planned to look hard for a used car today for me to buy. And I didn't. I have all the channels now for free. All the on demand and tv for free. This is what I love to create. Movies. I'm not creating them if I'm watching them. I'm not creating anything if I watch them. The power of video is great. I saw that last week with my group trying to explain to them about a "Circle of Trust" and I showed the video and they got it. I need to try things. I need to experience life.
Love and light.
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