1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Vacation
4. Quaker Meeting
5. Acceptance
6. Warm clothes
7. Cold weather
8. Chanting and music
9. Movies
10. Unconditional Love
I'm leaving today on my vacation. YAY! Last night I became clearer on letting go of commitments. There have been so many commitments I've made to myself that now keeping them is hurting me. I understand that now. Keeping commitments past the time of the commitments being useful is hurting me. And this is true for commitments I've made to others. Keeping them is hurting me, letting them go may hurt them. A lot of these commitments I'm keeping that I've made to others, the other people have already let them go. They have decided that I'm not going to go through with it, it's been years. They have let it go, and I'm still holding it over my head as a burden. Some other people hold it against me that I haven't come through, and others just let it go. Some will not believe me again when I tell them I will do something and follow through. That's what I can't stand. And it's because if I let these commitments to others go, how will I know that I will go through with what I tell others? How will I know that my word is good and my commitment means something? If I let these go, how can I commit to anything else? I know that holding these old commitments that give me pain is not helping me. Love and Light.
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Saturday, December 29, 2012
12-29-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Breakfast with a good friend
4. Chanting
5. Air conditioning
6. Computers and internet
7. Safety
8. Unconditional Love
9. Choices and responsibility
10. The Light
I slept in this morning, meaning I got up at 7 am before the dog woke up. That's what sleeping in has come to mean to me, waking up before the dog wakes me up. My adorable dog stayed in bed sleeping for another 20 minutes. He's getting rather old. He's cute when he snores. He scares himself when he farts. He runs away and looks at his butt at the same time with a look on his face of "what the hell was that?!" He's pretty gassy in his old age, and he's still not used to it, every fart he reacts like it's never happened before. He's pretty funny. I burn a lot of incense in the house. Wishing all a Happy New Year (no matter how it smells). Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Breakfast with a good friend
4. Chanting
5. Air conditioning
6. Computers and internet
7. Safety
8. Unconditional Love
9. Choices and responsibility
10. The Light
I slept in this morning, meaning I got up at 7 am before the dog woke up. That's what sleeping in has come to mean to me, waking up before the dog wakes me up. My adorable dog stayed in bed sleeping for another 20 minutes. He's getting rather old. He's cute when he snores. He scares himself when he farts. He runs away and looks at his butt at the same time with a look on his face of "what the hell was that?!" He's pretty gassy in his old age, and he's still not used to it, every fart he reacts like it's never happened before. He's pretty funny. I burn a lot of incense in the house. Wishing all a Happy New Year (no matter how it smells). Love and Light.
Friday, December 28, 2012
12-28-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Choices and responsibility
3. Expressing emotions and letting go
4. Unconditional Love
5. Compassion and understanding
6. Chanting
7. Music
8. Creativity
9. Snuggling under warm blankets
10. Cool weather
Yay, it's Friday! I'm ready for my vacation to start. I'm not sure if I will have access to a computer on my week off next week, so I may not be able to post to this blog. Or I'll be having so much fun enjoying my relaxation that I might not remember to post on this blog. I'm grateful I'll be able to get all my responsibilities done at work before I go. Now, I need to be sure I get everything together that I need for the trip. I'm struggling to be here in this moment. Be aware of the task in front of me. My trip will happen at the time it needs to happen. Right now I need to be here. Love and Light.
2. Choices and responsibility
3. Expressing emotions and letting go
4. Unconditional Love
5. Compassion and understanding
6. Chanting
7. Music
8. Creativity
9. Snuggling under warm blankets
10. Cool weather
Yay, it's Friday! I'm ready for my vacation to start. I'm not sure if I will have access to a computer on my week off next week, so I may not be able to post to this blog. Or I'll be having so much fun enjoying my relaxation that I might not remember to post on this blog. I'm grateful I'll be able to get all my responsibilities done at work before I go. Now, I need to be sure I get everything together that I need for the trip. I'm struggling to be here in this moment. Be aware of the task in front of me. My trip will happen at the time it needs to happen. Right now I need to be here. Love and Light.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
12-27-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Creativity and talent
4. Unconditional Love
5. Cool weather
6. Endless possibilities in every moment
7. Choices and responsibility
8. Therapy session
9. Warm blankets
10. Cuddling
I finished my list and now I'm flooded with other things I'm grateful for: Meditation, Chanting, Music, taking a moment and breathing, My wonderful job, Having the office to myself . . . and there are more. I feel gratitude today. Some of the time I make this list and it's a mental exercise, I don't feel it. I try to. I make the list to try to connect and FEEL grateful. Today I feel grateful and there is a feeling that I can only describe as an internal sigh of relief. That I have found it again. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Creativity and talent
4. Unconditional Love
5. Cool weather
6. Endless possibilities in every moment
7. Choices and responsibility
8. Therapy session
9. Warm blankets
10. Cuddling
I finished my list and now I'm flooded with other things I'm grateful for: Meditation, Chanting, Music, taking a moment and breathing, My wonderful job, Having the office to myself . . . and there are more. I feel gratitude today. Some of the time I make this list and it's a mental exercise, I don't feel it. I try to. I make the list to try to connect and FEEL grateful. Today I feel grateful and there is a feeling that I can only describe as an internal sigh of relief. That I have found it again. Love and Light.
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
12-26-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Feeling better every day
3. My car running well
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Deep conversations with dear friends
6. Choices and responsibility
7. Unconditional Love
8. Chanting
9. Daily readings
10. The Light
Christmas is over and we are coming to the end of the year (by some people's calendars). I'm looking forward to the new year as all my vacation time renews and I'm taking the first week of the year off! I need a vacation. Even doing a job that I love and I'm passionate about, doesn't mean I have to love it every day. There are some days I need to get away from it. I'm looking forward to going north to colder weather and visiting with friends. I'm feeling better and this upper respiratory infection is just about gone. I'm relaxed and calm. I enjoyed my day off yesterday and spent half of it with a dear friend visiting and sharing. Here's my wish to the world, open your hearts and share them. Love and Light.
2. Feeling better every day
3. My car running well
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Deep conversations with dear friends
6. Choices and responsibility
7. Unconditional Love
8. Chanting
9. Daily readings
10. The Light
Christmas is over and we are coming to the end of the year (by some people's calendars). I'm looking forward to the new year as all my vacation time renews and I'm taking the first week of the year off! I need a vacation. Even doing a job that I love and I'm passionate about, doesn't mean I have to love it every day. There are some days I need to get away from it. I'm looking forward to going north to colder weather and visiting with friends. I'm feeling better and this upper respiratory infection is just about gone. I'm relaxed and calm. I enjoyed my day off yesterday and spent half of it with a dear friend visiting and sharing. Here's my wish to the world, open your hearts and share them. Love and Light.
Monday, December 24, 2012
12-24-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Quiet day at work
4. My red shiny shirt
5. Dinner with friends
6. Feeling better
7. Organization
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. Choices and responsibility
10. The Light
I've been struggling with allowing myself to rest as I feel sick (or am I prolonging my sickness to watch TV to avoid feeling anything or experiencing life) or doing the things that I need to do to be healthy like cleaning and spiritual rituals (or am I doing things because I feel like I need to keep chugging along because that's what I do when I'm sick). I guess there are 4 struggles going on all pulling at each other. And then because of my asthma and bronchitis, I'm on antibiotics and steroids. I react to steroids by not being able to sleep. I constantly feel like I'm on the edge of sleep, all I have to do is close my eyes and I'll be asleep, I'm so tired, and I lie there and stay right on the edge . . . I am frustrated that I don't sleep and I'm exhausted. Just three more days of that and then blissful sleep and I shall be well and healthy. I'm ready. Merry Christmas Eve to all. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Quiet day at work
4. My red shiny shirt
5. Dinner with friends
6. Feeling better
7. Organization
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. Choices and responsibility
10. The Light
I've been struggling with allowing myself to rest as I feel sick (or am I prolonging my sickness to watch TV to avoid feeling anything or experiencing life) or doing the things that I need to do to be healthy like cleaning and spiritual rituals (or am I doing things because I feel like I need to keep chugging along because that's what I do when I'm sick). I guess there are 4 struggles going on all pulling at each other. And then because of my asthma and bronchitis, I'm on antibiotics and steroids. I react to steroids by not being able to sleep. I constantly feel like I'm on the edge of sleep, all I have to do is close my eyes and I'll be asleep, I'm so tired, and I lie there and stay right on the edge . . . I am frustrated that I don't sleep and I'm exhausted. Just three more days of that and then blissful sleep and I shall be well and healthy. I'm ready. Merry Christmas Eve to all. Love and Light.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
12-23-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Quaker Meeting
4. Cool weather
5. Drumming and music
6. Chanting
7. Unconditional Love
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. Choices and responsibility
10. Feeling better from my cold
I am feeling better. I've been sick with a cold for a week and now I'm on antibiotics and I'm happy I will be over this soon. I've used the excuse of being sick for not taking care of myself over and over again. My table is piled with junk I haven't bothered to put away. My kitchen is a wreck with dirty dishes all over the place. My living room cluttered with boxes and wrapping paper. Too tired to put anything away, I say. And then I look at the clutter and mess and I'm able to call myself disgusting. I am not disgusting. I am not my thoughts or behaviors or the mess I create. Yes, I create the mess, I am not the mess. I am a spiritual being having a human experience. And currently I'm having trouble with my human experience. I am always of The Light. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Quaker Meeting
4. Cool weather
5. Drumming and music
6. Chanting
7. Unconditional Love
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. Choices and responsibility
10. Feeling better from my cold
I am feeling better. I've been sick with a cold for a week and now I'm on antibiotics and I'm happy I will be over this soon. I've used the excuse of being sick for not taking care of myself over and over again. My table is piled with junk I haven't bothered to put away. My kitchen is a wreck with dirty dishes all over the place. My living room cluttered with boxes and wrapping paper. Too tired to put anything away, I say. And then I look at the clutter and mess and I'm able to call myself disgusting. I am not disgusting. I am not my thoughts or behaviors or the mess I create. Yes, I create the mess, I am not the mess. I am a spiritual being having a human experience. And currently I'm having trouble with my human experience. I am always of The Light. Love and Light.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
12-22-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Cool weather!!
3. A new day and new beginning
4. Knowing I am Light and not my beliefs and behaviors
5. My car running well
6. Endless possibilities in every moment
7. Choices and responsibility
8. Modern medicine
9. The children of the world and the child living inside every person
10. Unconditional Love
I have been sick for a week. I've had a fever for most of that time. I've been going to work, going to events, ignoring that I'm sick, believing that I'll get better in the future, believing that I deserve to suffer and feel miserable through all of this. Enough! I am going to the walk-in clinic today and getting some help. I know I have an infection because what I am coughing up is yellowish (GROSS!!). I feel being sick and I feel my emotions about being sick and now I'm going to get help so that I'm not sick for very much longer. Love and Light.
2. Cool weather!!
3. A new day and new beginning
4. Knowing I am Light and not my beliefs and behaviors
5. My car running well
6. Endless possibilities in every moment
7. Choices and responsibility
8. Modern medicine
9. The children of the world and the child living inside every person
10. Unconditional Love
I have been sick for a week. I've had a fever for most of that time. I've been going to work, going to events, ignoring that I'm sick, believing that I'll get better in the future, believing that I deserve to suffer and feel miserable through all of this. Enough! I am going to the walk-in clinic today and getting some help. I know I have an infection because what I am coughing up is yellowish (GROSS!!). I feel being sick and I feel my emotions about being sick and now I'm going to get help so that I'm not sick for very much longer. Love and Light.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
12-20-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Affirmations
3. Unconditional Love
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Choices and responsibility
6. Music
7. Conscious Community Gathering
8. Being of service
9. My car running well
10. All my emotions
So I've been sick for 6 days now and I haven't allowed myself to rest and get better. I've been going to work and going to events that I've already planned. That's my pattern, to ignore the signals my body is giving me and I keep chugging along. And I also use being sick for NOT doing my daily rituals and practices that help me feel better and become centered. Like chanting and meditating in the morning, I haven't done it since I started feeling sick. I haven't been eating well. I haven't been sleeping well, staying up too late doing things for others. I've also been getting up in the middle of the night as my dog has been sick with diarrhea, so I'm up cleaning up after him. I see that I'm the one continuing my cold. I'm the one causing myself to suffer longer. It's like this with emotions, I tell myself that I'm not allowed to feel whatever I'm feeling, usually by rationalization that it doesn't make sense for me to feel whatever. And then I suffer along with it rather than just giving my emotions voice and space and air for 5 minutes. It doesn't matter if what I'm feeling is reasonable, all that matters is that I feel it, whatever emotion. I feel it. And with my sick cold, to allow myself to lie around and be sick, cancel all my plans and be sick for a few hours to let it go. Love and Light.
2. Affirmations
3. Unconditional Love
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Choices and responsibility
6. Music
7. Conscious Community Gathering
8. Being of service
9. My car running well
10. All my emotions
So I've been sick for 6 days now and I haven't allowed myself to rest and get better. I've been going to work and going to events that I've already planned. That's my pattern, to ignore the signals my body is giving me and I keep chugging along. And I also use being sick for NOT doing my daily rituals and practices that help me feel better and become centered. Like chanting and meditating in the morning, I haven't done it since I started feeling sick. I haven't been eating well. I haven't been sleeping well, staying up too late doing things for others. I've also been getting up in the middle of the night as my dog has been sick with diarrhea, so I'm up cleaning up after him. I see that I'm the one continuing my cold. I'm the one causing myself to suffer longer. It's like this with emotions, I tell myself that I'm not allowed to feel whatever I'm feeling, usually by rationalization that it doesn't make sense for me to feel whatever. And then I suffer along with it rather than just giving my emotions voice and space and air for 5 minutes. It doesn't matter if what I'm feeling is reasonable, all that matters is that I feel it, whatever emotion. I feel it. And with my sick cold, to allow myself to lie around and be sick, cancel all my plans and be sick for a few hours to let it go. Love and Light.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
12-19-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Creativity and talent
4. Unconditional Love
5. The Light
6. Breathing
7. A new day
8. Organization
9. Music and musical instruments
10. Gentleness
Wow, making this list was unusually hard today. I've been stuck trying to think of something for number 10 for hours. I finally "cheated" and looked at a previous list for ideas. The list was hard because I'm quite grumpy today. A lot of little annoyances are bothering me. I'm tired of being sick with a mild cold. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Creativity and talent
4. Unconditional Love
5. The Light
6. Breathing
7. A new day
8. Organization
9. Music and musical instruments
10. Gentleness
Wow, making this list was unusually hard today. I've been stuck trying to think of something for number 10 for hours. I finally "cheated" and looked at a previous list for ideas. The list was hard because I'm quite grumpy today. A lot of little annoyances are bothering me. I'm tired of being sick with a mild cold. Love and Light.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
12-18-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Snoozing the alarm 12 times
3. DayQuil
4. Music
5. Breathing
6. My car running well
7. US Postal Service
8. Unconditional Love
9. The Light
10. A new day
I'm in the process of getting over my cold. I have waves of feeling good and I think I'm all better, and then there is a wave of not feeling so good and I am frustrated as this was only supposed to last 2 days. I'm on day 4 now. I'm allowing me getting sick to throw me off track. I haven't been doing my morning rituals of chanting and meditating opting instead to snooze in longer. Since I'm sick and there isn't anybody helping me, I feel like I get a free pass to live like a pig for a week or more and let trash and clutter build up. I have a hard time thinking and focusing and catch myself staring off into space thinking of nothing for long periods of time (there's where my meditation went). I need to remember that taking care of myself includes chanting and meditating and cleaning and cleansing of my sacred space and taking care that I am sacred. Even when sick with a cold. Love and Light.
2. Snoozing the alarm 12 times
3. DayQuil
4. Music
5. Breathing
6. My car running well
7. US Postal Service
8. Unconditional Love
9. The Light
10. A new day
I'm in the process of getting over my cold. I have waves of feeling good and I think I'm all better, and then there is a wave of not feeling so good and I am frustrated as this was only supposed to last 2 days. I'm on day 4 now. I'm allowing me getting sick to throw me off track. I haven't been doing my morning rituals of chanting and meditating opting instead to snooze in longer. Since I'm sick and there isn't anybody helping me, I feel like I get a free pass to live like a pig for a week or more and let trash and clutter build up. I have a hard time thinking and focusing and catch myself staring off into space thinking of nothing for long periods of time (there's where my meditation went). I need to remember that taking care of myself includes chanting and meditating and cleaning and cleansing of my sacred space and taking care that I am sacred. Even when sick with a cold. Love and Light.
Monday, December 17, 2012
12-17-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Sleeping in
3. Breathing
4. Getting over a cold
5. Winning a huge HDTV
6. My Christmas tree
7. Starting new
8. USPS flat rate boxes
9. Unconditional love
10. Doing my best
I was sick with a nasty cold all weekend and allowed myself to be a lump on my couch. Today I'm at work and tonight when I get home I will be doing a thorough cleaning as I've let everything get really bad at home. I'm doing my best. I'm safe and loved. Love and Light.
2. Sleeping in
3. Breathing
4. Getting over a cold
5. Winning a huge HDTV
6. My Christmas tree
7. Starting new
8. USPS flat rate boxes
9. Unconditional love
10. Doing my best
I was sick with a nasty cold all weekend and allowed myself to be a lump on my couch. Today I'm at work and tonight when I get home I will be doing a thorough cleaning as I've let everything get really bad at home. I'm doing my best. I'm safe and loved. Love and Light.
Friday, December 14, 2012
12-14-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Sleeping through my alarm
3. Creativity and Inventiveness
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Holiday parties
6. My wonderful job
7. Music
8. Opening to larger perspectives
9. Christmas lights
10. Unconditional Love
I've been contemplating my commitments, who and what I've committed to, and I'm such a bulldog when I commit to a project, that I hang on so tight even when everybody else has dropped off and let go of it. I cannot say that I've failed at following through on a commitment. I keep it on my to do list and I feel the burden of it and I use it as a block to move forward clearly with my new projects. I see now how I use my old commitments to keep me from doing new projects. I stop myself from started a new project that I'm excited about, telling myself I have to finish this old project first. I need to find a way to let go of old commitments with grace and forgiveness and feeling any hurt or disappointment I've caused in others by not honoring my commitment. This has shaken up what I thought was clearness on commitments. I see now that I have not been looking at my commitments clearly at all. I am starting down a new path. Love and Light.
2. Sleeping through my alarm
3. Creativity and Inventiveness
4. Endless possibilities in every moment
5. Holiday parties
6. My wonderful job
7. Music
8. Opening to larger perspectives
9. Christmas lights
10. Unconditional Love
I've been contemplating my commitments, who and what I've committed to, and I'm such a bulldog when I commit to a project, that I hang on so tight even when everybody else has dropped off and let go of it. I cannot say that I've failed at following through on a commitment. I keep it on my to do list and I feel the burden of it and I use it as a block to move forward clearly with my new projects. I see now how I use my old commitments to keep me from doing new projects. I stop myself from started a new project that I'm excited about, telling myself I have to finish this old project first. I need to find a way to let go of old commitments with grace and forgiveness and feeling any hurt or disappointment I've caused in others by not honoring my commitment. This has shaken up what I thought was clearness on commitments. I see now that I have not been looking at my commitments clearly at all. I am starting down a new path. Love and Light.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
12-13-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Sleeping well
3. My car running well
4. Friends and Family
5. Joy
6. New Moon Drumming
7. My wonderful job
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. The Light
10. Unconditional Love
I'm very tired and happy today. I ran a camera for the Holiday Parade last night and had a lot of fun, and got paid for it! I feel so blessed to be able to do what I love to do, I have fun, I'm creative and I'm paid for what I do. There are times where I'm frustrated with this job, where the creativity doesn't flow easily and I feel burdened by this job, and there are times where I feel like I don't deserve to be paid for having fun. In all, I am grateful to be doing what I enjoy to do. I still get excited when we take the truck out and the physicality of pulling cable, setting up cameras on tripods and hooking up monitors. This is fun for me. Love and Light.
2. Sleeping well
3. My car running well
4. Friends and Family
5. Joy
6. New Moon Drumming
7. My wonderful job
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. The Light
10. Unconditional Love
I'm very tired and happy today. I ran a camera for the Holiday Parade last night and had a lot of fun, and got paid for it! I feel so blessed to be able to do what I love to do, I have fun, I'm creative and I'm paid for what I do. There are times where I'm frustrated with this job, where the creativity doesn't flow easily and I feel burdened by this job, and there are times where I feel like I don't deserve to be paid for having fun. In all, I am grateful to be doing what I enjoy to do. I still get excited when we take the truck out and the physicality of pulling cable, setting up cameras on tripods and hooking up monitors. This is fun for me. Love and Light.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
12-12-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Holiday Parade
3. My car running well
4. Chanting
5. Music
6. Creativity
7. Silence
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. All my emotions
10. The Light
I'm so excited to shoot the holiday parade this evening. I love being part of a camera crew, this will be what we call a truck roll. Which means we will have 3 cameras being switched live in the truck. This is fun for me and I love parades! When I'm shooting I stay completely in the present moment. There isn't any room for me to think about what presents I still have to get, no room to think about my schedule and how am I going to fit in all the things I need to do this month. I am fully present and aware of what is happening in front of me, aware of my framing and focus. Now if I can take that attention to every task I do every day, how enjoyable life would be. Love and Light.
2. Holiday Parade
3. My car running well
4. Chanting
5. Music
6. Creativity
7. Silence
8. Endless possibilities in every moment
9. All my emotions
10. The Light
I'm so excited to shoot the holiday parade this evening. I love being part of a camera crew, this will be what we call a truck roll. Which means we will have 3 cameras being switched live in the truck. This is fun for me and I love parades! When I'm shooting I stay completely in the present moment. There isn't any room for me to think about what presents I still have to get, no room to think about my schedule and how am I going to fit in all the things I need to do this month. I am fully present and aware of what is happening in front of me, aware of my framing and focus. Now if I can take that attention to every task I do every day, how enjoyable life would be. Love and Light.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
12-11-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Happy people at Dunkin Donuts
4. Love and Light
5. My mastermind group
6. Therapy
7. Family and Friends
8. My wonderful job
9. My mistakes
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I don't normally stop at Dunkin Donuts and this morning I was running a little late, and more honestly I didn't want to deal with cooking breakfast for myself. So I stopped in and the little Dunkin Donuts was cranking business with lots of workers behind the counter, and one outside helping with directing traffic through the tiny parking lot and drive-thru. I was so impressed with the positive energy of everyone behind the counter, they were helpful with each other and I witnessed a couple of mistakes made with a laugh and they just remade the order as fast as they could and things moved beautifully through that little store. I want to thank them so much for exuding such positive energy and working collaboration to set my day on a positive note and with much love for my working team. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Happy people at Dunkin Donuts
4. Love and Light
5. My mastermind group
6. Therapy
7. Family and Friends
8. My wonderful job
9. My mistakes
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I don't normally stop at Dunkin Donuts and this morning I was running a little late, and more honestly I didn't want to deal with cooking breakfast for myself. So I stopped in and the little Dunkin Donuts was cranking business with lots of workers behind the counter, and one outside helping with directing traffic through the tiny parking lot and drive-thru. I was so impressed with the positive energy of everyone behind the counter, they were helpful with each other and I witnessed a couple of mistakes made with a laugh and they just remade the order as fast as they could and things moved beautifully through that little store. I want to thank them so much for exuding such positive energy and working collaboration to set my day on a positive note and with much love for my working team. Love and Light.
Monday, December 10, 2012
12-10-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Helpful fun friends
3. My car running well
4. Music
5. Chanting
6. Gentleness
7. Unconditional Love
8. Sleeping well
9. Breathing
10. The Light.
Over the weekend a bunch of friends and I were sitting around on the floor relaxing and talking. A good friend of mine reached out playfully and squeezed my toes and unknowingly to her, I had a broken pinky toe that she squeezed as I was wearing socks. I yelled out in pain. She couldn't see my bruised and swollen toe hidden inside my socks. She immediately said, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that." The thing is that she reached out with playfulness, love and gentleness and unknowingly touched a wound that I have. There was no way for her to know I had a broken tow. And we all do that sometimes, reach out with love and gentleness and no matter how gently, if we touch a wound it hurts the other person. We didn't know the wound is there, there was no way for us to know. As a child nobody explained this to me, so I started believing that reaching out with love and gentleness and play causes wounds in others. I had no idea that the wound is theirs, that it was there way before I ever reached out and unwittingly touched it. Others are responsible for caring for their own wounds, as I am responsible for mine. I want my friend to reach out to me playfully with love, I want her to continue doing it. My toe will heal and not always be broken. Love and Light.
2. Helpful fun friends
3. My car running well
4. Music
5. Chanting
6. Gentleness
7. Unconditional Love
8. Sleeping well
9. Breathing
10. The Light.
Over the weekend a bunch of friends and I were sitting around on the floor relaxing and talking. A good friend of mine reached out playfully and squeezed my toes and unknowingly to her, I had a broken pinky toe that she squeezed as I was wearing socks. I yelled out in pain. She couldn't see my bruised and swollen toe hidden inside my socks. She immediately said, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that." The thing is that she reached out with playfulness, love and gentleness and unknowingly touched a wound that I have. There was no way for her to know I had a broken tow. And we all do that sometimes, reach out with love and gentleness and no matter how gently, if we touch a wound it hurts the other person. We didn't know the wound is there, there was no way for us to know. As a child nobody explained this to me, so I started believing that reaching out with love and gentleness and play causes wounds in others. I had no idea that the wound is theirs, that it was there way before I ever reached out and unwittingly touched it. Others are responsible for caring for their own wounds, as I am responsible for mine. I want my friend to reach out to me playfully with love, I want her to continue doing it. My toe will heal and not always be broken. Love and Light.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
12-6-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Belief in myself
3. My car running well
4. Creativity and talent
5. MC'ing an event
6. Relaxation
7. Surrender
8. Forgiveness
9. Unconditional Love
10. The Light
I've learned that about a month and a half ago that I stopped believing in myself, my Truth within. At that time I was away from my home in an experience that I perceived everybody there did not believe in me. The first couple of days I struggled to stand in my Truth and was able to do it. By the end of the the third day and the trip, I had completely denied myself. I had believed what other people were telling me (or omitting telling me, thinking it must not be important or true if nobody says anything about it). I came back home carrying that denial and doubt of myself. This was easy for me to do and hide even from myself, because it is so familiar carrying denial and doubt of myself all through childhood. I finally allowed myself to feel my hurt and sadness and anger at myself for denying me, my Truth, which was screaming inside every cell to be heard only by me. That trip was a very good step and a blessing for me to practice standing in my Truth. Love and Light.
2. Belief in myself
3. My car running well
4. Creativity and talent
5. MC'ing an event
6. Relaxation
7. Surrender
8. Forgiveness
9. Unconditional Love
10. The Light
I've learned that about a month and a half ago that I stopped believing in myself, my Truth within. At that time I was away from my home in an experience that I perceived everybody there did not believe in me. The first couple of days I struggled to stand in my Truth and was able to do it. By the end of the the third day and the trip, I had completely denied myself. I had believed what other people were telling me (or omitting telling me, thinking it must not be important or true if nobody says anything about it). I came back home carrying that denial and doubt of myself. This was easy for me to do and hide even from myself, because it is so familiar carrying denial and doubt of myself all through childhood. I finally allowed myself to feel my hurt and sadness and anger at myself for denying me, my Truth, which was screaming inside every cell to be heard only by me. That trip was a very good step and a blessing for me to practice standing in my Truth. Love and Light.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
12-5-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Chanting with my community
3. Creativity and talent
4. Playing with After Effects
5. My car running well
6. Positive collaboration
7. Breathing
8. Unconditional Love
9. Affirmation
10. The Light
I got into work and immediately started working on this project I created. I made an animation in 3D space that I'm very happy came out really well. I enjoy learning new things and I'm surprised after I learn something and work through it that I remember in the beginning having such resistance to jumping in and learning it. When the whole process for me is enjoyable, except for the getting started part of pushing past my fear and resistance. I'm now waiting for the whole project to render and I'm very excited to see the finished product. I'm proud of what I created. Love and Light.
2. Chanting with my community
3. Creativity and talent
4. Playing with After Effects
5. My car running well
6. Positive collaboration
7. Breathing
8. Unconditional Love
9. Affirmation
10. The Light
I got into work and immediately started working on this project I created. I made an animation in 3D space that I'm very happy came out really well. I enjoy learning new things and I'm surprised after I learn something and work through it that I remember in the beginning having such resistance to jumping in and learning it. When the whole process for me is enjoyable, except for the getting started part of pushing past my fear and resistance. I'm now waiting for the whole project to render and I'm very excited to see the finished product. I'm proud of what I created. Love and Light.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
12-4-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Creativity and Talent
3. Excellent and Noble Friends
4. Sleeping well
5. Music
6. Warm blanket on a cold morning
7. Crying and sobbing
8. Experience
9. Endless possiblities in every moment
10. Unconditional Love
Again walking into work and instantly bombarded with people wanting tasks and projects completed before it is physically possible to do so. I'm much calmer (and sleep deprived) today. I am human. I am limited (in a physical world sense, not in a spiritual world sense). And I set my intention for this day to work on what's in front of me easily and effortlessly with love and the day flows by in perfect order. Love and Light.
2. Creativity and Talent
3. Excellent and Noble Friends
4. Sleeping well
5. Music
6. Warm blanket on a cold morning
7. Crying and sobbing
8. Experience
9. Endless possiblities in every moment
10. Unconditional Love
Again walking into work and instantly bombarded with people wanting tasks and projects completed before it is physically possible to do so. I'm much calmer (and sleep deprived) today. I am human. I am limited (in a physical world sense, not in a spiritual world sense). And I set my intention for this day to work on what's in front of me easily and effortlessly with love and the day flows by in perfect order. Love and Light.
Monday, December 3, 2012
12-3-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Breathing
4. Music
5. Chanting
6. The TV off for most of the day at work
7. Choices and responsibility
8. My journals
9. Creativity
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I am writing this list and entry very late in the day. That's because as soon as I walked through the door this morning at work, I was bombarded with tasks and projects. This is a rare occurance in my job, mostly I have the mornings to do this blog, and some other email and office organizational tasks before jumping in on one or more projects that are assigned to me. And most of my tasks and projects have no deadline on them, except for the tasks today. And the deadlines are by the end of today. So I jumped right into doing my tasks, and most of the things I have never done before in this job. Things can change with no warning and I'm glad that I've been able to flow with it for the most part. I did have quite a few moments of fear and frustration popping up. I tried to breathe through them and relax again. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Breathing
4. Music
5. Chanting
6. The TV off for most of the day at work
7. Choices and responsibility
8. My journals
9. Creativity
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I am writing this list and entry very late in the day. That's because as soon as I walked through the door this morning at work, I was bombarded with tasks and projects. This is a rare occurance in my job, mostly I have the mornings to do this blog, and some other email and office organizational tasks before jumping in on one or more projects that are assigned to me. And most of my tasks and projects have no deadline on them, except for the tasks today. And the deadlines are by the end of today. So I jumped right into doing my tasks, and most of the things I have never done before in this job. Things can change with no warning and I'm glad that I've been able to flow with it for the most part. I did have quite a few moments of fear and frustration popping up. I tried to breathe through them and relax again. Love and Light.
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