12-30-12 grateful for today

1.  My adorable dog
2.  My car running well
3.  Vacation
4.  Quaker Meeting
5.  Acceptance
6.  Warm clothes
7.  Cold weather
8.  Chanting and music
9.  Movies
10.  Unconditional Love

I'm leaving today on my vacation.  YAY! Last night I became clearer on letting go of commitments.  There have been so many commitments I've made to myself that now keeping them is hurting me.  I understand that now.  Keeping commitments past the time of the commitments being useful is hurting me.  And this is true for commitments I've made to others.  Keeping them is hurting me, letting them go may hurt them.  A lot of these commitments I'm keeping that I've made to others, the other people have already let them go.  They have decided that I'm not going to go through with it, it's been years.  They have let it go, and I'm still holding it over my head as a burden.  Some other people hold it against me that I haven't come through, and others just let it go.  Some will not believe me again when I tell them I will do something and follow through.  That's what I can't stand.  And it's because if I let these commitments to others go, how will I know that I will go through with what I tell others?  How will I know that my word is good and my commitment means something?  If I let these go, how can I commit to anything else?  I know that holding these old commitments that give me pain is not helping me.  Love and Light.