1. My adorable dog
2. Waking up naturally without an alarm
3. My car running well
4. A fresh new day clean and ready to be lived
5. Unconditional love
6. The Light
7. Abundance of everything
8. My emotions coming up from where they have been buried for too long
9. Knowing courage is what I find after walking through my fear
10. Music
I woke up stiff and sore. Moving about brings sharper pains than lying still. Lying still and not moving has its dull ache to it. I know that moving and experiencing the sharp pains brings lubrication back to my stiff joints and the easier it will be for me to flow through and experience my day. I become stiff because I tense up. I tense and form a muscle wall so that my experiences don't really touch me. I need to open up and allow my life experiences to change me. Change in a healthy good way.
Love and light.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
5-5-11 grateful for today
1. Hugs
2. My job in my career of choice
3. My adorable dog
4. Caring friends
5. Chanting
6. Drumming
7. My creative talents and abilities
8. Endless possibilities and choices
9. Life experiences
10. Expressing and honoring emotions, mine and others
I'm getting better at doing this list every day. There were long gaps and the gaps are getting shorter. I loved last night at my chanting circle. I recieved and gave many hugs. My life through most of the month doesn't have many hugs in it. I would like to have more hugs. I would like to be able to hug every day. I'm the only one that can make it happen. I am the one to decide to give hugs. Am I a pack animal or a lone wolf? I have been living as a person alone and outside, am I now craving to be within a circle of a tribe every day?
Love and light.
2. My job in my career of choice
3. My adorable dog
4. Caring friends
5. Chanting
6. Drumming
7. My creative talents and abilities
8. Endless possibilities and choices
9. Life experiences
10. Expressing and honoring emotions, mine and others
I'm getting better at doing this list every day. There were long gaps and the gaps are getting shorter. I loved last night at my chanting circle. I recieved and gave many hugs. My life through most of the month doesn't have many hugs in it. I would like to have more hugs. I would like to be able to hug every day. I'm the only one that can make it happen. I am the one to decide to give hugs. Am I a pack animal or a lone wolf? I have been living as a person alone and outside, am I now craving to be within a circle of a tribe every day?
Love and light.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
5-3-11 grateful for today
1. My wonderful job
2. My creative abilities and talents
3. My adorable dog
4. Freedom and responsibility in my decisions
5. Unconditional love
6. Transformational experiences
7. A spiritual week full of ritual and connection
8. My car running well
9. My computer running well
10. Endless possibilites.
There is freedom when I take full responsibility of my decisions. My decision to have a messy kitchen. My decision to wait until the last minute to get my submission to a film festival. I realize that I am the only one procrastinating, and really trying to treat myself by how I feel about myself inside. I have a new way of taking care of myself. I'm going to take care of myself as if I am a person that I love and want to take care of. This is new. I have been waiting until I love every part of me to be able to take care of myself, so now I'm waiting no longer. And by acting "as if" I believe I will love myself, even the parts I think I can't.
Love and light.
2. My creative abilities and talents
3. My adorable dog
4. Freedom and responsibility in my decisions
5. Unconditional love
6. Transformational experiences
7. A spiritual week full of ritual and connection
8. My car running well
9. My computer running well
10. Endless possibilites.
There is freedom when I take full responsibility of my decisions. My decision to have a messy kitchen. My decision to wait until the last minute to get my submission to a film festival. I realize that I am the only one procrastinating, and really trying to treat myself by how I feel about myself inside. I have a new way of taking care of myself. I'm going to take care of myself as if I am a person that I love and want to take care of. This is new. I have been waiting until I love every part of me to be able to take care of myself, so now I'm waiting no longer. And by acting "as if" I believe I will love myself, even the parts I think I can't.
Love and light.
Monday, May 2, 2011
5-2-11 grateful for today
1. My creative wonderful job
2. My car running well
3. My adorable dog
4. Trust in friends
5. Unconditional love
6. Tai Chi
7. Meditation
8. The Light
9. Guidance
10. Connection
Trust is a big issue for me. A lot of the time I need to remind myself to trust myself. Trust my inner knowing, trust that I am on my path, trust the day that I am in and the body I inhabit. That's a LOT for me. I've been doing a lot of things to avoid knowing that I'm even in my body, let alone trust it. Distracting myself with TV shows and movies to watch other people make connections and experience thing, rather than trust my own experience and connection in the world. I've been procrastinating and not doing things to take care of myself, so I won't have the chance to trust my inner knowing. Trusting myself is a big deal. It takes pressure off of trusting others. Yes, trust in others is important. If I'm betraying my own trust, there is nothing to give to others. In order to gain trust, you have to give trust. I need to give trust to myself.
2. My car running well
3. My adorable dog
4. Trust in friends
5. Unconditional love
6. Tai Chi
7. Meditation
8. The Light
9. Guidance
10. Connection
Trust is a big issue for me. A lot of the time I need to remind myself to trust myself. Trust my inner knowing, trust that I am on my path, trust the day that I am in and the body I inhabit. That's a LOT for me. I've been doing a lot of things to avoid knowing that I'm even in my body, let alone trust it. Distracting myself with TV shows and movies to watch other people make connections and experience thing, rather than trust my own experience and connection in the world. I've been procrastinating and not doing things to take care of myself, so I won't have the chance to trust my inner knowing. Trusting myself is a big deal. It takes pressure off of trusting others. Yes, trust in others is important. If I'm betraying my own trust, there is nothing to give to others. In order to gain trust, you have to give trust. I need to give trust to myself.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
4-26-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My wonderful job
3. My creative talents and abilities
4. Trust in myself and my experiences
5. Learning new things all the time
6. Unconditional love
7. Tai chi
8. Breathing
9. Abundance of life
10. Joy.
I'm writing this at work and I'm very scared of what I'm doing this afternoon. I'm shooting people for different scenes in my commercial. I've had an overwhelming feeling that I have no idea what I'm doing and I'm in way over my head. I do know what I'm doing. I've been doing filming and editing for over 15 years now. And now people pay me to do it. My old shadow is creeping around me telling me I'm not good enough. I'm going to do my best and experience life today.
I'm trying very hard to be positive, to know that I am filled with abundance of everything I need in this life. I have learned that I do not "need" things from outside of myself. I take care of all my own needs. I admit today that the larger part of me does not believe that. A larger part of me that is so very angry of taking care of myself everyday. A larger part of me that is so sad and hurt that my parents did not protect me and were the ones that hurt me the most when I was a child. I want somebody who loves me unconditionally to hold me while I cry and tell me that everything is going to be alright. That I am okay and loved. That all this pain is being released from me and I am being healed. Today, I am tired of telling and doing all that for myself. I want someone else to carry me today.
Love and light.
2. My wonderful job
3. My creative talents and abilities
4. Trust in myself and my experiences
5. Learning new things all the time
6. Unconditional love
7. Tai chi
8. Breathing
9. Abundance of life
10. Joy.
I'm writing this at work and I'm very scared of what I'm doing this afternoon. I'm shooting people for different scenes in my commercial. I've had an overwhelming feeling that I have no idea what I'm doing and I'm in way over my head. I do know what I'm doing. I've been doing filming and editing for over 15 years now. And now people pay me to do it. My old shadow is creeping around me telling me I'm not good enough. I'm going to do my best and experience life today.
I'm trying very hard to be positive, to know that I am filled with abundance of everything I need in this life. I have learned that I do not "need" things from outside of myself. I take care of all my own needs. I admit today that the larger part of me does not believe that. A larger part of me that is so very angry of taking care of myself everyday. A larger part of me that is so sad and hurt that my parents did not protect me and were the ones that hurt me the most when I was a child. I want somebody who loves me unconditionally to hold me while I cry and tell me that everything is going to be alright. That I am okay and loved. That all this pain is being released from me and I am being healed. Today, I am tired of telling and doing all that for myself. I want someone else to carry me today.
Love and light.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
4-23-11 grateful for today
1. My new job doing what I love and am passionate about
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. Abundance of cash flow this month
5. Connecting with people
6. Divine light
7. Experiences living my life
8. Desire to live in a cleaner organized home
9. Creative spirit
10. Unconditional love
I had a very easy time coming up with this list today. I find it interesting because I've been having emotional challenges that cut very deeply. I know by diving into the emotional wound and pulling out the toxins is necessary to heal. I don't know if I truly "feel" the healing. Like when I damage a muscle and there is the pain that feels more damaging to the muscle if I try to use it, so rest is required. Then there is the pain of using the muscle that has with it a feeling of healing. My muscle hurts when I move it and yet I know that moving it through this pain is something that is helpful. I don't know if I'm able to discern the difference with my emotional wounds yet. After all that exploratory explanation, I am now clear that I am afraid of emotionally damaging myself further by trying to move through pain which really needs more time to rest. This is where trust and faith come in, my core issue.
Love and light.
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. Abundance of cash flow this month
5. Connecting with people
6. Divine light
7. Experiences living my life
8. Desire to live in a cleaner organized home
9. Creative spirit
10. Unconditional love
I had a very easy time coming up with this list today. I find it interesting because I've been having emotional challenges that cut very deeply. I know by diving into the emotional wound and pulling out the toxins is necessary to heal. I don't know if I truly "feel" the healing. Like when I damage a muscle and there is the pain that feels more damaging to the muscle if I try to use it, so rest is required. Then there is the pain of using the muscle that has with it a feeling of healing. My muscle hurts when I move it and yet I know that moving it through this pain is something that is helpful. I don't know if I'm able to discern the difference with my emotional wounds yet. After all that exploratory explanation, I am now clear that I am afraid of emotionally damaging myself further by trying to move through pain which really needs more time to rest. This is where trust and faith come in, my core issue.
Love and light.
Friday, April 8, 2011
4-8-11 grateful for today
1. My wonderful new job
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. My creative ablilities and talents
5. All of my emotions
6. Moving forward on my journey
7. My computer running well
8. A park with a tree to sit under for lunchtime
9. Unconditional love
10 Choices
Had a hard time with this list today. The first 4 were easy, then I struggled with coming up with the rest. It tells me something about where I am today emotionally and spiritually that Love is at #9 and it was quite a long time for me to think of that. I love my new job, that it is very creative and I'm doing what I love, video work. I have a lot of waves of fear and anxiety come over me. I tell myself that I am safe and I deserve to have a job where I feel like I play all day and get paid for it.
Love and light.
2. My adorable dog
3. My car running well
4. My creative ablilities and talents
5. All of my emotions
6. Moving forward on my journey
7. My computer running well
8. A park with a tree to sit under for lunchtime
9. Unconditional love
10 Choices
Had a hard time with this list today. The first 4 were easy, then I struggled with coming up with the rest. It tells me something about where I am today emotionally and spiritually that Love is at #9 and it was quite a long time for me to think of that. I love my new job, that it is very creative and I'm doing what I love, video work. I have a lot of waves of fear and anxiety come over me. I tell myself that I am safe and I deserve to have a job where I feel like I play all day and get paid for it.
Love and light.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)