1. My adorable dog
2. Creativity and talent
3. Sunrise, a new day
4. Music
5. Chanting
6. Meditation
7. My car running well
8. All my emotions
9. New beliefs and committment
10. Unconditional love
Technology has robbed us of natural lessons of transformation. I've been wondering lately why does it take so long for a new affirmation, a new belief to take hold in me. I decide on a new belief and it seems like my emotions are against me. Things are not better right away. I see that my new belief is the healthy way to be and yet I catch myself doing the unhealthy behavior. And that's where modern technology has robbed us from lessons from nature. We walk into a pitch black room, flip a switch and BAM! instant light bright as day. We can even have it set up to flip a switch and BAM! a roaring fire. That's where we get so frustrated when we decide to believe something new and it doesn't transform everything about us immediately. We think what's wrong with me? If we were still living close to nature, the lessons would be there for us. Have you ever tried to start a campfire with flint and steel. The spark is the new belief. The belief in fire. To start I have to concentrate and focus on getting the spark to land on the tinder, then carefully pay attention to the small fragile flame that starts. I have to feed little bits into it slowly and nurture the flame. I can't dump a whole bunch of wood on the small fire and walk away expecting to come back to a roaring campfire. I have to be there watching it, feeding it, creating the environment for the belief to take hold and grow. Slowly adding larger twigs, gently and with patience, and slowly larger. Eventually I have I fire I do not have to have my whole focus on for a while and I only need to throw a log on it every once in a while. That's what we have to do with these affirmations and new beliefs. We expect them to just take hold, but there is more we have to do. We have to create the experiences to validate and support those new beliefs. We have to focus on them and nurture them. There is something beautiful about this transformation. And I have a reminder daily of this beauty, the sunrise. At the end of the night, there is a new belief of a new day. This belief doesn't make the sun pop into midday. There is a process of transformation and it is a glow on the horizon, and then the beauty of the sunrise transforming this new belief of a new day into reality. That is the beauty of transformation. Love and Light.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Sunday, July 8, 2012
7-8-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Shower
3. A new day to start again
4. Chanting
5. Music
6. Dancing
7. Silence
8. Love and Light
9. Choices and responsibility, my decisions
10. Engaging in life
Sometimes when I'm really down, I wonder when I'll start believing these affirmations that I'm telling myself. And I realized I'll start believing them when I decide to. That's all it takes to believe. Then why is it so hard to change? Because my emotions and habits don't change as fast as my decision. For example, I believe that feeling hungry is natural and healthy and eating things I like to satisfy that hunger is natural and healthy and enjoyable. I decided to believe that, it is the natural order. Then I practice it . . . feeling hungry betrayal comes up in me, that feeling is part of my old belief, part of the pattern I've been doing for 40 years. I get food ready and fear comes up in me, again part of my old belief. Where is the enjoyment I told myself about? Where is the acceptance that this process is natural and safe? I believe these things now. And I've spent the last 40 years making sure that my experience of eating validated and supported my old belief. All of those years making sure that eating was terrifying and hurt, that living life was terrifying and hurt. I decide to believe that eating is safe, natural and joyful. I decide to believe that living life is safe, natural and joyful. I now make sure that my experience of eating validates and supports my new belief. Love and Light.
2. Shower
3. A new day to start again
4. Chanting
5. Music
6. Dancing
7. Silence
8. Love and Light
9. Choices and responsibility, my decisions
10. Engaging in life
Sometimes when I'm really down, I wonder when I'll start believing these affirmations that I'm telling myself. And I realized I'll start believing them when I decide to. That's all it takes to believe. Then why is it so hard to change? Because my emotions and habits don't change as fast as my decision. For example, I believe that feeling hungry is natural and healthy and eating things I like to satisfy that hunger is natural and healthy and enjoyable. I decided to believe that, it is the natural order. Then I practice it . . . feeling hungry betrayal comes up in me, that feeling is part of my old belief, part of the pattern I've been doing for 40 years. I get food ready and fear comes up in me, again part of my old belief. Where is the enjoyment I told myself about? Where is the acceptance that this process is natural and safe? I believe these things now. And I've spent the last 40 years making sure that my experience of eating validated and supported my old belief. All of those years making sure that eating was terrifying and hurt, that living life was terrifying and hurt. I decide to believe that eating is safe, natural and joyful. I decide to believe that living life is safe, natural and joyful. I now make sure that my experience of eating validates and supports my new belief. Love and Light.
Friday, July 6, 2012
7-6-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Friday
3. My wonderful creative job
4. All my emotions and feelings engaging me in life
5. Divine guidance
6. Unconditional Love
8. Friends
9. Music and chanting
10. The Light
What shall I write about today? I am peaceful with life today. It's Friday and I'm at work, and nothing is pressing to get done today. I'm feeling rather relaxed and ready for the weekend to start. Feeling is the thing. Sharing love is purpose for all life. There is no need for any other purpose. Love and Light.
2. Friday
3. My wonderful creative job
4. All my emotions and feelings engaging me in life
5. Divine guidance
6. Unconditional Love
8. Friends
9. Music and chanting
10. The Light
What shall I write about today? I am peaceful with life today. It's Friday and I'm at work, and nothing is pressing to get done today. I'm feeling rather relaxed and ready for the weekend to start. Feeling is the thing. Sharing love is purpose for all life. There is no need for any other purpose. Love and Light.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
7-5-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My wonderful job
3. Being of service
4. Everything that helps me engage in life
5. All my emotions, feeling and expressing them
6. Creativity
7. The step on my journey that I am in right now
8. Unconditional Love
9. Silence
10. Music
I am doing much better today. There are times that I forget that sometimes I need to move toward The Light. I forget because the Light is in and around everything. It is constantly flowing and I can see it everywhere. So if it is everywhere and in me, why would I have to move toward it? That's my limited engineering brain trying solve emotions with logic. I forget that my emotions are not there to be solved. My emotions are there for me to feel engaged in life and the Light. All my emotions are part of my Soul and my Soul is part of the Light. How do I explain this simply when it is much deeper? Okay, an example, when I am feeling scared and sad I can feel this and separate it from Light, kind of like saying that these emotions are not part of the Light, or I have the choice to feel this and move it into the Light, move toward the Light. A big part is gratitude, thanking being scared and sad for engaging me in life. Interesting how emotional energy works. Love and Light.
2. My wonderful job
3. Being of service
4. Everything that helps me engage in life
5. All my emotions, feeling and expressing them
6. Creativity
7. The step on my journey that I am in right now
8. Unconditional Love
9. Silence
10. Music
I am doing much better today. There are times that I forget that sometimes I need to move toward The Light. I forget because the Light is in and around everything. It is constantly flowing and I can see it everywhere. So if it is everywhere and in me, why would I have to move toward it? That's my limited engineering brain trying solve emotions with logic. I forget that my emotions are not there to be solved. My emotions are there for me to feel engaged in life and the Light. All my emotions are part of my Soul and my Soul is part of the Light. How do I explain this simply when it is much deeper? Okay, an example, when I am feeling scared and sad I can feel this and separate it from Light, kind of like saying that these emotions are not part of the Light, or I have the choice to feel this and move it into the Light, move toward the Light. A big part is gratitude, thanking being scared and sad for engaging me in life. Interesting how emotional energy works. Love and Light.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
7-4-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. A day off of work
3. All my emotions and feeling
4. Safety
5. Love
6. Light
7. Friends and connection
8. Engaging in my life
9. Creativity and talent
10. Writing
It is day 15 of my 30 day food plan. I cried a lot again at breakfast and I am okay. I am feeling lighter. I saw my therapist yesterday about it and helped me see to be grateful for my emotions, grateful for anger, fear, sadness, joy, food. Because feeling helps me to be engaged in life. For so long, I learned to survive and protect myself by not engaging in life, to detach, to be on the outside just watching. Now I want to live! I want to live! I want to engage in me and then I will connect more fully to others. Love and Light.
2. A day off of work
3. All my emotions and feeling
4. Safety
5. Love
6. Light
7. Friends and connection
8. Engaging in my life
9. Creativity and talent
10. Writing
It is day 15 of my 30 day food plan. I cried a lot again at breakfast and I am okay. I am feeling lighter. I saw my therapist yesterday about it and helped me see to be grateful for my emotions, grateful for anger, fear, sadness, joy, food. Because feeling helps me to be engaged in life. For so long, I learned to survive and protect myself by not engaging in life, to detach, to be on the outside just watching. Now I want to live! I want to live! I want to engage in me and then I will connect more fully to others. Love and Light.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
7-3-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. All my emotions, experiences and feelings
4. Music
5. Creativity
6. Unconditional Love
7. The Light
8. Rituals/Practices/Ceremony
9. Guidance
10. Faith and Trust
I heard a great quote today: "the lesson in [creating art] is not to be attached to the object, but practice another way of being in the world." I love to create things, let my imagination go and create. It could be a short film I create, an animation, acting, could be a wood carving, drawing, sculpting, painting, musical instrument, creating music, writing stories, memoirs, flowcharts, . . . I love to create. And I stop creating, and I block myself from creating when I am attached to the finished product, or when others are attached to my finished product. I need to practice another way of being in the world. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. All my emotions, experiences and feelings
4. Music
5. Creativity
6. Unconditional Love
7. The Light
8. Rituals/Practices/Ceremony
9. Guidance
10. Faith and Trust
I heard a great quote today: "the lesson in [creating art] is not to be attached to the object, but practice another way of being in the world." I love to create things, let my imagination go and create. It could be a short film I create, an animation, acting, could be a wood carving, drawing, sculpting, painting, musical instrument, creating music, writing stories, memoirs, flowcharts, . . . I love to create. And I stop creating, and I block myself from creating when I am attached to the finished product, or when others are attached to my finished product. I need to practice another way of being in the world. Love and Light.
Monday, July 2, 2012
7-2-12 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. A very long work day
4. My warm comfortable jacket
5. Friends
6. Unconditional Love
7. The Light
8. Faith
9. Perseverance
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I need to remember to do this list on the weekend. I had a very rough weekend. I cried a lot. I felt lost and alone. I know The Light is out there and within me . . . . I haven't been able to feel it lately. This is what Faith is, knowing that The Light hasn't changed or gone away while I'm feeling so much hurt, I have a hard time feeling the light. I forget the Light is still there. This is how I feel now, not forever. I'm safe. I'm safe to feel hurt and express it. I keep trying to believe that. Keep trying to believe that I'm safe. Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. A very long work day
4. My warm comfortable jacket
5. Friends
6. Unconditional Love
7. The Light
8. Faith
9. Perseverance
10. Endless possibilities in every moment
I need to remember to do this list on the weekend. I had a very rough weekend. I cried a lot. I felt lost and alone. I know The Light is out there and within me . . . . I haven't been able to feel it lately. This is what Faith is, knowing that The Light hasn't changed or gone away while I'm feeling so much hurt, I have a hard time feeling the light. I forget the Light is still there. This is how I feel now, not forever. I'm safe. I'm safe to feel hurt and express it. I keep trying to believe that. Keep trying to believe that I'm safe. Love and Light.
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