10-18-11 grateful for today

1. My creative talents and abilities
2. My adorable dog
3. Snoozing
4. My wonderfully creative job
5. Working as a team
6. Calmness and relaxation
7. Chanting and Music
8. Tai Chi
9. Responsibility
10. Unconditional Love

Back around 2002 I was the happiest person laid off from my job at the time. I was burnt out working 60-70 hour weeks. I was making a lot of money that I had no time to spend. So, when I was laid off and cashing out of stock options and other things, I had enough money to not need a job for 2 years. I loved that time. I felt as if I had no responsibilities. I worked on things that I enjoyed and felt free of other people's expectations and ideas of performance. I wrote a novel, volunteered working as a PA on movies and shoots, and other projects as I felt an interest tugging me in one direction or another. It was wonderful and I felt free of responsibility. And the money ran out and I needed to get a job again. And I'm doing great now, I have a job working as a video producer/editor and I love it. I feel the pressure of responsibility, of other's expectations and ideas of performance. I was wondering how do I feel free within responsibility? I guess I haven't reconciled or embraced the idea that this company is paying me to BE ME. Every other job I've had in my life I've had to work at tasks that were not me. Now I'm being paid by others to be the person I am. To be that person I was when I had no job. And it feels a little weird.
Love and Light.