1. My adorable dog
2. Waking up naturally
3. Paying bills
4. Cleaning and Laundry
5. Breathing
6. My Life, all of it
7. Movies that touch my heart
8. Chanting
9. Honoring and expressing my emotions
10. Unconditional love.
My dog wanted his own grateful list today:
1. My person being home today
2. My toys and my person playing with me
3. Crawling under covers
4. Running
5. Napping in the late morning . . . and again in the afternoon
6. Lying in the sun
7. Walks with my person
8. Scratches and pets and lying on my person
9. Being in only this moment
10. Barking
There's a lot I can learn from my dog's list. If I lose touch of what gratitude feels like, if I over analyze and get into my head about what it means or why it's on my list or start getting lost on what "should" be on my list rather than what I feel grateful for, I watch my dog find and lie down in the small patch of sun coming through the window. I can see his gratitude, he is so grateful it comes out of him in a peaceful thankful way as he lies down and enjoys the sun on his fur.
Love and Light.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
12-30-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. My car running well
3. Cool weather
4. Sleeping well
5. My heart hurting
6. Loving friends
7. Having the office to myself this week
8. Arms and legs and hands and feet and body
9. Touch and hugs
10. Happy Hour
Am I grateful for existing? I don't know. I wasn't able to put it on the list. I was able to put my heart hurting on my list. I am grateful for feeling this. I feel a deep hurt and it feels like its in the center of my chest. A deep sadness/hurt. My heart wanting to grow and I feel like another part of me is squeezing it small. Or another . . . . memory? energy? What or who am I without my heart? What is wrapped so tightly around my heart that tears when my heart grows?
Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. Cool weather
4. Sleeping well
5. My heart hurting
6. Loving friends
7. Having the office to myself this week
8. Arms and legs and hands and feet and body
9. Touch and hugs
10. Happy Hour
Am I grateful for existing? I don't know. I wasn't able to put it on the list. I was able to put my heart hurting on my list. I am grateful for feeling this. I feel a deep hurt and it feels like its in the center of my chest. A deep sadness/hurt. My heart wanting to grow and I feel like another part of me is squeezing it small. Or another . . . . memory? energy? What or who am I without my heart? What is wrapped so tightly around my heart that tears when my heart grows?
Love and Light.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
12-29-11 grateful for today
1. Cool weather
2. My adorable dog
3. Loving my friends
4. Committments
5. Laughter
6. Being of service
7. My car running well
8. Joy
9. Writing
10. Expression
I had a hard time coming up with 10 things this morning. I feel preoccupied with some of my old buried feelings coming forward in me. My mind keeps telling me, "I don't know what to do with them." And my heart tells me, "Feel them. The gift is within feeling them fully." That bridge I've been asked to create between my head and my heart is feeling my feelings fully and witnessing for myself with understanding from my mind. My mind resists. I ask for help and guidance from the Light (Spirit/God).
Love and Light.
2. My adorable dog
3. Loving my friends
4. Committments
5. Laughter
6. Being of service
7. My car running well
8. Joy
9. Writing
10. Expression
I had a hard time coming up with 10 things this morning. I feel preoccupied with some of my old buried feelings coming forward in me. My mind keeps telling me, "I don't know what to do with them." And my heart tells me, "Feel them. The gift is within feeling them fully." That bridge I've been asked to create between my head and my heart is feeling my feelings fully and witnessing for myself with understanding from my mind. My mind resists. I ask for help and guidance from the Light (Spirit/God).
Love and Light.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
12-28-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Allowing my emotions to reveal my path to healing
3. Meditation
4. Chanting
5. Experiencing life
6. Wonderment
7. The beginners mind
8. Faith and trust
9. Endless possibilities in every moment
10. Committment
I am tired today. I didn't sleep much last night. I had a big day. Yesterday during session a lot of buried emotion was brought forward and I made a big committment for the next 5 months. I feel hurt and sadness from a long time ago that I need to release. I didn't release it last night because I was tired and needed sleep. I didn't sleep. I didn't release it this morning because I needed to make sure that my therapist understood what happened so long ago. I don't fully understand. I'm not releasing it now because I am at work. This is the suffering I put myself through, putting off truly feeling this deep wound of hurt, to touch it lovingly, to give it air, because all of that means I will finally hurt deeply. I know I will survive hurting deeply. I already have. It happened so long ago and I buried the hurt away until I was strong enough to survive it. Until I knew that there is beautiful gift of feeling all of life more deeply now because of it. I am okay.
Love and Light.
2. Allowing my emotions to reveal my path to healing
3. Meditation
4. Chanting
5. Experiencing life
6. Wonderment
7. The beginners mind
8. Faith and trust
9. Endless possibilities in every moment
10. Committment
I am tired today. I didn't sleep much last night. I had a big day. Yesterday during session a lot of buried emotion was brought forward and I made a big committment for the next 5 months. I feel hurt and sadness from a long time ago that I need to release. I didn't release it last night because I was tired and needed sleep. I didn't sleep. I didn't release it this morning because I needed to make sure that my therapist understood what happened so long ago. I don't fully understand. I'm not releasing it now because I am at work. This is the suffering I put myself through, putting off truly feeling this deep wound of hurt, to touch it lovingly, to give it air, because all of that means I will finally hurt deeply. I know I will survive hurting deeply. I already have. It happened so long ago and I buried the hurt away until I was strong enough to survive it. Until I knew that there is beautiful gift of feeling all of life more deeply now because of it. I am okay.
Love and Light.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
12-27-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable sleepy dog
2. My car running well
3. A nice relaxing morning
4. My computer running well
5. Mental health counseling later today
6. Going with the flow of change
7. Endless possibilities in every moment
8. The TV off at work
9. Unconditional love
10. Faith and Trust
Is there a difference between Faith and Trust? I need to be mindful and bring these in my life today. I am grateful for my therapy session scheduled today. What I tend to forget is to trust my therapist and have faith in the process of healing. I am bringing those things with me today. Trust and Faith. I just got a piece of understanding. I used to think that I struggle with embracing trust and faith, with doing those actions. And really trusting and believing are quite easy for me to do. What I struggle with is letting go of my fear. I struggle with my habit of pushing trust and faith away from me, my habit of having to have it all figured out before hand, my habit of running in my imagination every terrible thing that could happen. I struggle with letting go of fear.
Love and Light.
2. My car running well
3. A nice relaxing morning
4. My computer running well
5. Mental health counseling later today
6. Going with the flow of change
7. Endless possibilities in every moment
8. The TV off at work
9. Unconditional love
10. Faith and Trust
Is there a difference between Faith and Trust? I need to be mindful and bring these in my life today. I am grateful for my therapy session scheduled today. What I tend to forget is to trust my therapist and have faith in the process of healing. I am bringing those things with me today. Trust and Faith. I just got a piece of understanding. I used to think that I struggle with embracing trust and faith, with doing those actions. And really trusting and believing are quite easy for me to do. What I struggle with is letting go of my fear. I struggle with my habit of pushing trust and faith away from me, my habit of having to have it all figured out before hand, my habit of running in my imagination every terrible thing that could happen. I struggle with letting go of fear.
Love and Light.
Monday, December 26, 2011
12-26-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. The day off
3. Chanting
4. Writing
5. Free to express my emotions
6. Staying home
7. Perseverance
8. Baby steps
9. Strength and courage
10. Unconditional love
I don't really want to be writing this post or coming up with things I'm grateful for today. I was looking forward to staying home and not having anything planned or anywhere that I needed to go. Now I'm sitting here and I'm forced to take a long uninterrupted look at what a mess my life is. Let me narrow that down and make it not so general. I have my desk littered with bills unpaid and a budget not looked at for a month. I have my dining room table piled high with projects half finished, paper that was thrown there because I don't know what to do with it and other miscellaneous things that fall under the category "I want to keep this but I don't know why and I don't know where to put it." Things I keep lose the honor I have for them if I don't find a place in my home for them. Just like project I don't honor to make time to finish for them. And I sit looking around, overwhelmed with stuff and clutter. Time to make room for me in my own house! Time find places for all things whether with me or with someone/place else. First off, I'm taking the christmas tree down. That will make some room.
Love and Light.
2. The day off
3. Chanting
4. Writing
5. Free to express my emotions
6. Staying home
7. Perseverance
8. Baby steps
9. Strength and courage
10. Unconditional love
I don't really want to be writing this post or coming up with things I'm grateful for today. I was looking forward to staying home and not having anything planned or anywhere that I needed to go. Now I'm sitting here and I'm forced to take a long uninterrupted look at what a mess my life is. Let me narrow that down and make it not so general. I have my desk littered with bills unpaid and a budget not looked at for a month. I have my dining room table piled high with projects half finished, paper that was thrown there because I don't know what to do with it and other miscellaneous things that fall under the category "I want to keep this but I don't know why and I don't know where to put it." Things I keep lose the honor I have for them if I don't find a place in my home for them. Just like project I don't honor to make time to finish for them. And I sit looking around, overwhelmed with stuff and clutter. Time to make room for me in my own house! Time find places for all things whether with me or with someone/place else. First off, I'm taking the christmas tree down. That will make some room.
Love and Light.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
12-25-11 grateful for today
1. My adorable dog
2. Sleeping in
3. Incredibly detailed, entertaining dreams
4. opening presents
5. Quaker meeting
6. Sharing feelings with friends
7. Love and Joy
8. Taking time to play
9. Surrounding all with love
10. Endless possibilities in every moment.
Me and my dog opened presents from my mom this morning. My dog loves to open boxes and things and see what's in them. It was fun this morning. I got what I asked for, and I'm so excited. A Kindle. I carry around many books for reference, spiritual, affirmations, they help me to be centered, they also help make my bag very heavy. So, I'm happy for this little device that can hold all the books for me. Then I ran into frustration because the only way to register it is through a wifi connection. I do not have one. I've been dragging my feet and this has to do with my resistance to change also. So, frustration and resistance to the nudge to make my place wireless. BLAH! I breathe and honor my emotions, anger, sadness and breathe some more. I'm going to Meeting and I enjoy my Kindle and the nudge. Merry Christmas to all, and to all BREATHE!
Love and Light.
2. Sleeping in
3. Incredibly detailed, entertaining dreams
4. opening presents
5. Quaker meeting
6. Sharing feelings with friends
7. Love and Joy
8. Taking time to play
9. Surrounding all with love
10. Endless possibilities in every moment.
Me and my dog opened presents from my mom this morning. My dog loves to open boxes and things and see what's in them. It was fun this morning. I got what I asked for, and I'm so excited. A Kindle. I carry around many books for reference, spiritual, affirmations, they help me to be centered, they also help make my bag very heavy. So, I'm happy for this little device that can hold all the books for me. Then I ran into frustration because the only way to register it is through a wifi connection. I do not have one. I've been dragging my feet and this has to do with my resistance to change also. So, frustration and resistance to the nudge to make my place wireless. BLAH! I breathe and honor my emotions, anger, sadness and breathe some more. I'm going to Meeting and I enjoy my Kindle and the nudge. Merry Christmas to all, and to all BREATHE!
Love and Light.
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