12-28-11 grateful for today

1. My adorable dog
2. Allowing my emotions to reveal my path to healing
3. Meditation
4. Chanting
5. Experiencing life
6. Wonderment
7. The beginners mind
8. Faith and trust
9. Endless possibilities in every moment
10. Committment

I am tired today. I didn't sleep much last night. I had a big day. Yesterday during session a lot of buried emotion was brought forward and I made a big committment for the next 5 months. I feel hurt and sadness from a long time ago that I need to release. I didn't release it last night because I was tired and needed sleep. I didn't sleep. I didn't release it this morning because I needed to make sure that my therapist understood what happened so long ago. I don't fully understand. I'm not releasing it now because I am at work. This is the suffering I put myself through, putting off truly feeling this deep wound of hurt, to touch it lovingly, to give it air, because all of that means I will finally hurt deeply. I know I will survive hurting deeply. I already have. It happened so long ago and I buried the hurt away until I was strong enough to survive it. Until I knew that there is beautiful gift of feeling all of life more deeply now because of it. I am okay.
Love and Light.