5-6-13 grateful for today

1.  My adorable dog
2.  My car running well
3.  The office to myself
4.  Beautiful cool breeze this morning
5.  Chanting
6.  Ability to type
7.  Awareness
8.  Unconditional Love
9.  Spirit
10.  Choices and responsibility

I feel like I am on the edge of understanding why I procrastinate and self-sabotage.  I feel like I am on the edge of shifting to no longer goof off out of fear, put things off out of fear, play video games or watch tv rather than do the thing I really want to do.  I'm on the edge of understanding why I'm so afraid of doing the things I really want to do.  I'm so afraid of enjoying myself and being happy.  I'm right there on that edge, I can almost see . . . it's very blurry and I keep thinking the vision is going to become clearer, like adjusting binoculars.  Even when I finally understand, I will still need to take action, to actually do something to move forward.  Only I can do that for myself.  Love and Light.