1-17-11 grateful for today

1. A beautiful overcast day off
2. My adorable dog
3. Unconditional love of everything
4. Cooking a turkey
5. Being truly and authentically me
6. Friends and true connections
7. Pen and paper
8. Having things right in front of me to work on
9. Endless possibility and opportunity
10. Going with the flow.

This is my 4th day off in a row and I've rested some and I've worked on some projects some. I like that. There is a part of me that is very uncomfortable with me being comfortable and taking care of myself with gentleness and love. All of this is new. I am used to punishing myself, beating myself up mentally, emotionally, and (way in the past) physically. Stopping my physical beating myself up was hard and yet the easiest as it was the easiest for me to see and identify. Mentally and emotionally has been harder for me to identify, to clearly see myself doing it. Each day I become clearer and I'm able to see myself denying my own emotions, and denying my own trust of myself. I am aware and I am grateful that I am aware. Because now I can work on what is right in front of me, changing it.

Love and light